Esprit 2015- Do Something!

Hello all! It's been awhile. Hope all is well! I'm writing this blog in a quaint hotel  room on a sleepless night in beautiful Colorado (though by the time I post this I'll be back in good ol' Nebraska.). I'm here with a wonderful group called Esprit. For the past few months this has been my life. Practices, choreography, blocking, dress rehearsal, and finally tour in Colorado for a couple days and Nebraska for the rest of the week. My prayer leading up to tour was, "Lord, make this real. Make this mine. Grow us. Break up the fallow grounds of my heart. Mold me and make me into who YOU want me to be." For weeks I have prayed his prayer. You see two years ago on my first Esprit tour I re-dedicated my life to God with the help of a wonderful woman. Last year I experienced God's creation in a whole new way, by seeing the breathtaking mountains of Colorado for the very first time. This year not just the "Esprit year", but the 2014-2015 has been a whole new experience. I have grown not only as a person, but also in my relationship with God. I have felt Him in new ways that I never have before. Which brings me back to my prayer,"Make this real Lord. Make this mine.Grow me. Grow us. Break up the fallow ground of my heart. Mold me and make me into who you want me to be". These past couple of years of Esprit have been amazing! They have impacted my lives in huge ways! but this year I felt a special connection with God and answered prayers. I have never in my life felt as close to my Savior as I do now. He took his plow and broke the tough, calloused, skins covering my heart. Our relationship is ours. It's mine. Not that of my mom, or friends, or pastors, or that of what is expected of me. Our relationship has grown into something beautiful! It grew slowly as I watched my friends sing their hearts out for Jesus and my family and friends smile with joy in the audience. It grew as I watched the faces of the the children at camp IdRaHaJe light up with happiness and laughter. Then all at once as we stood performing in a park with a sight of mountains and the sun setting in the background. Yet that was not the sight I was watching. I was mesmerized by the three people just to my left. Three homeless people and three lost souls. I looked over during one of our more powerful songs,"Unredeemed" and as we sang these words, "It may be unfulfilled, It may be unrestored. but when anything that's shattered is layed before the Lord. Just watch and see it will not be unredeemed." My heart was crushed as I saw them worshipping the one and only God. After the performance I made a point to meet these lovely souls. Raymond, Heidi, and Gilbert. As I listened to their stories. I learned that they had been living on the streets for a long time. All three had health issues, but Heidi was especially bad. She lost most her teeth years ago, has breathing troubles, and her legs/ feet are in terrible condition. She can't walk, stand, or sit for long periods of time. She can't walk with out a cane, (a broom stick) or a shopping cart. I listened as they told me they felt abandoned, lost, and hopeless. I listened as the told how that had changed after our concert. They had so little, yet they had everything because they felt true love from the Lord. I was honored to pray with them and another friend. Before we left they told me we had changed their lives. With tears in my eyes I walked back to the bus and thought, "No. You changed mine.". At that moment God had torn away the last layer of callouses. He dug deep into the root of my heart and and plowed away the part that had caused such trouble. It was then that I finally realized the impact this group has on people. It was then that I knew exactly why I was not feeling God in my life recently. Merriam-Webster dictionary defines a relationship as, " the way in which two or more people, groups, countries, etc., talk to, behave toward, and deal with each other". A relationship goes two ways. You're going to get out of it what you put in. If I wanted to see God in my life I needed to actively seek Him. " 12 Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will hear you.13 You will seek me and find me, when you seek me with all your heart." Jeremiah 29:12-13 If I am seeking Him with all my heart, I WILL find Him. I never felt Him, because I hardly ever spent time with Him. A personal relationship with Jesus Christ is the best relationship you can and ever will have, but it takes work. You can't just expect changes in your life if you don't read His word or spend time talking with Him. I was wanting to feel Him and see Him, but it was almost impossible, because I spent so little time with Him. Most time the most important relationship is the on you value the most and the one you put first. That should be our relationship with God, but often he is our last choice or last resort. Even if we are lost sheep on the run, He will leave the others to come searching for us and He will rejoice once we have come back! He loves us more than any words could describe. So instead of opening that Pinterest app, pointlessly scrolling through Facebook, spending hours on the internet or phone, or even just staring blankly at the T.V. Shut them off, close the pages, and open the pages that tell you story after story. Every genre can be found, love, fiction (Parables), Non-fiction, biography, auto-biography, mystery, and so so SO much more! You'll never know what you're missing out on until you unplug from the world and plug into the eternal life source!