The process has begun. The process of processing all that God opened my eyes to while I was in Kenya and just like last time- it hurts like hell. I know how to better handle all these emotions and feelings and thoughts this time, but that doesn’t make it any easier or any less real. I’ve said it so many times and I’m going to say it again, because in case someone missed it- mission trips are more than touching stories and sweet pictures. There’s more to the whole experience than one can explain. There's more depth to it than one snapshot can convey. That’s why you get the touching stories and sweet pictures, because no one wants to hear about the struggles. No one wants to hear about the not so great things, because we just don’t talk about those things. Well y’all I don’t like to live inside the imaginary limitations we create for ourselves and I am hear to say that the coming back from a third world country and recovering is like walking through hell on earth. Until you have walked in the shoes of someone who has you can not deny that what we are feeling is very real, acceptable, and so hard. I can not speak for everyone and I can not fully explain all that I am walking through right now, but I will try.
I’m disgusted. I’m ticked. I’m broken. I feel helpless. I don’t understand. But I am filled with joy. I’m disgusted because I heard a comment the other day and I’m sorry if it was you, but it went something like this, “I can’t drink from a faucet! I only drink bottled water.” Are you kidding me?! You know how many people I met who would give anything to be able to drink faucet water?! You have access to unlimited, clean water and we too often take it for granted. Before anyone lectures me, yes I know that I can not be upset at them, because it is quite possible that God has not opened their eyes like He has mine. It's hard. Seeing so much, feeling so much, and coming back to so many who do not understand. It hurts. Wanting everyone to understand and them not necessarily wanting to. I'm frustrated. I'm frustrated because my heart is feeling so much and my mind can not separate all of it's thoughts. I so badly want to fully express my whole experience, but I can't. I can not find all of the words to say and so all I say is that it was amazing or incredible, which frustrates me, because those words are huge understatements. I'm ticked. I'm ticked at my selfish self for complaining about taking cold showers, I'm ticked at those around me who complain about the smallest and sometimes dumbest things, I'm ticked at God. I know what you are thinking already, "Rebekah, you can't be mad at God and you can't ask Him why". You're right to a certain extent. You are right that I have no place to be mad at God and ask hard questions, because He is good and that's the way things are. BUT. Our heavenly father wants a real and raw relationship with us. He wants to love us though the good and the bad, even if that means we are mad at Him and that especially means asking Him hard questions. It is often through those times of anger that we are the most honest with God and during those times we find the most growth.
I wrote the first half of this blog about 4 weeks after I returned and then I stopped. I got too caught up in my emotions and frustrations of not being able to fully convey the recovery process. We do not talk about processing your experience because it is so hard. It's like having peroxide poured into a large, infected gash on the side of your leg- painful, but necessary. I have stories I could share that would show you the pain I felt there and I have stories that would show you the joy. I would love to share those, but for now I will not. It has been six months since I returned. You know, God really does work in mysterious ways, because now it's six months until I leave again and y'all, my heart is so ready. I have never been on a trip that filled me with so much love and joy and I can not wait to continue to spread it to the people of Kenya once again.
Sunday, July 15, 2018
Sunday, January 28, 2018
Putting Feelings into Words- The Adventures of Africa
I have a lot of feelings, but I don’t have a lot of words and I don’t know exactly how to put those feelings into words. Here are a few words to describe what I have seen and felt: hurt, pain, anger, sadness, guilt, shame, disgust, lost, desperate, hunger, Love, joy, little things, smiles, hugs, genuine, hope, potential, strong,!fighter, beautiful. Take those words how you will, but my guess is that we are not on the same page when we think about those words and I so wish I could fully elaborate what I am seeing and what I am feeling, but I can not yet. I can tell you that many of these words have more than one feeling or sight, for instance- I see and hunger and thirst for food and water, but I also see a hunger and thirst for something more, for the only one who can satisfy that, for Jesus. Many of these words go together- I see pain and hurt, but I also see hope and potential, especially when a young runs up to me and says, “Mozungo, one day I’m gonna be a nurse and save lots of people just like you”. Keep dreamin baby girl because I know you have potential and you’re gonna make it.
You see I have this thing that’s a curse, but it really is a blessing. When I see people in pain and struggling, my heart automatically feels exactly the way they are feeling. It’s hard in times of hurt but so joyous in time of celebration. Long story short: my heart is feeling a lot right now.
Friday- January 19, 2018:
Today was a pretty easy going day. We had a home visit in the morning and had a little time at the school to hang out with the kiddos at school after tea time. We then headed to an absolutely gorgeous waterfall! I was terrified most of the time because the hike included climbing down rocks and steep paths to see the waterfall and I don’t do heights with no railing or anything. It was for sure an adventure, but pretty cool to see. After the waterfall we had time to play with the kids at school. Before our free time, we were able to hand out new game uniforms to all the kids and it was so fu.n to see their reactions and their great big smiles. They were so grateful! That was pretty much our day, because of the travel ban it makes things a little tricky because we have to be back by dark, but we make it work! Tomorrow we are headed to the Rift Valley!
Saturday- January 20, 2018:
We got to sleep in today! Meaning I slept until 7.. 😂 we started the day by going to a small market to get souvenirs. I can not get over how cheap things are here! I got a necklace for like $1.50 and a hand carved and painted sign for $7. It was so cool to see all the things they make and just how different the culture here is than the US.
After the market we started our trek to the look out spot for Rift Valley. It was beautiful. God sure is quite the artist! We then drove down into the Rift Valley and visited a mango farm which was neat. Once we finished at the mango farm we went up the mountains a little more and ate at a restaurant and I ate SO MUCH MANGO. Oh my grascious it was sooooo good!! We finished eating and then went on another hike to see a baby waterfall.
It was pretty late by the time we finished, so we headed back to the hotel after that.
To sum up today- God took my breath away. Wow oh wow is His creation stunning!
Sunday- January 21, 2018:
You see I have this thing that’s a curse, but it really is a blessing. When I see people in pain and struggling, my heart automatically feels exactly the way they are feeling. It’s hard in times of hurt but so joyous in time of celebration. Long story short: my heart is feeling a lot right now.
Friday- January 19, 2018:
Today was a pretty easy going day. We had a home visit in the morning and had a little time at the school to hang out with the kiddos at school after tea time. We then headed to an absolutely gorgeous waterfall! I was terrified most of the time because the hike included climbing down rocks and steep paths to see the waterfall and I don’t do heights with no railing or anything. It was for sure an adventure, but pretty cool to see. After the waterfall we had time to play with the kids at school. Before our free time, we were able to hand out new game uniforms to all the kids and it was so fu.n to see their reactions and their great big smiles. They were so grateful! That was pretty much our day, because of the travel ban it makes things a little tricky because we have to be back by dark, but we make it work! Tomorrow we are headed to the Rift Valley!
Saturday- January 20, 2018:
We got to sleep in today! Meaning I slept until 7.. 😂 we started the day by going to a small market to get souvenirs. I can not get over how cheap things are here! I got a necklace for like $1.50 and a hand carved and painted sign for $7. It was so cool to see all the things they make and just how different the culture here is than the US.
After the market we started our trek to the look out spot for Rift Valley. It was beautiful. God sure is quite the artist! We then drove down into the Rift Valley and visited a mango farm which was neat. Once we finished at the mango farm we went up the mountains a little more and ate at a restaurant and I ate SO MUCH MANGO. Oh my grascious it was sooooo good!! We finished eating and then went on another hike to see a baby waterfall.
It was pretty late by the time we finished, so we headed back to the hotel after that.
To sum up today- God took my breath away. Wow oh wow is His creation stunning!
Sunday- January 21, 2018:
Today we went to church at the school (literally lasted like 3 hours) and said goodbye to 4 members of our team. The rest of the day was spent hanging out and loving on those sweet kids. We pulled out a speaker and some music and had a big dance party/parade and it was an absolute blast!! We were back at the hotel by 6 for dinner and to prepare for our clinic in the morning.
Monday- January 22, 2018:
Words can not describe how exhausted, humbled, and broken I am after today. We were up by and ready to leave by 7am and arrived to our location near Nahndi Hills around 8:30. We quickly set up all we needed for the clinic and began to see patients. I started out paired with a Kenyan nurse who translated for me and then threw me in the deep end meaning, she told me the patients symptoms and told me to diagnose the prescribe medication for the patient. "ummm she knows I am a nursing student right? Like I am no where close to qualified to do what you are asking me to do..." Were some of my immediate thoughts. How was I suppose to diagnose and prescribe?! My heart was pounding and I was slightly shaky. She gave me the symptoms for the first patient.-red eyes with discharge, nausea/vomiting, diarrhea, fever and chills-
Monday- January 22, 2018:
Words can not describe how exhausted, humbled, and broken I am after today. We were up by and ready to leave by 7am and arrived to our location near Nahndi Hills around 8:30. We quickly set up all we needed for the clinic and began to see patients. I started out paired with a Kenyan nurse who translated for me and then threw me in the deep end meaning, she told me the patients symptoms and told me to diagnose the prescribe medication for the patient. "ummm she knows I am a nursing student right? Like I am no where close to qualified to do what you are asking me to do..." Were some of my immediate thoughts. How was I suppose to diagnose and prescribe?! My heart was pounding and I was slightly shaky. She gave me the symptoms for the first patient.-red eyes with discharge, nausea/vomiting, diarrhea, fever and chills-
My first diagnosis: Malaria. She was only 14. I prescribed an antimalarial pill, deworming pill, dehydration pill, and drops for her eyes and suggested she go to the hospital. I gave the paper to the nurse she looked it over and said, "good" as she handed the paper to the patient and gave them further instructions. "What do you think will happen to her" I asked the nurse. She told me she more than likely will not go to the hospital because she has no money. Once she finishes her pills she will fight until she can't fight anymore. I was not okay with this answer there has to be something more I or we can do. A disease that is now treatable is still taking the lives of thousands. The next patient was an older man. He pulled up his pant legs and before I even looked I smelt a horrible smell and then I looked. It looked as though his legs had wounds all over and that they were rotting. A few flies buzzed around his legs as he also revealed that infection was spreading to his arms. It was some sort of fungal infection that was way over due for treatment or something like cellulitis. He has had this for over 6 years. 6 YEARS AND NO ACCESS TO ANY MEDICAL CARE. I prescribed an antibiotic, 2 topical creams, and told him he needed to see a specialist. "What about him?" I asked. "If he doesn't seek further treatment he could be gone after 2 weeks". " Are you kidding me?! My first 2 patients and they probably won't make it. How is this okay?! How are we allowing people to live like this while we complain about minuscule things?! How can you see this and not be totally ticked?!" Were some of my thoughts as I choked back the tears and continued to see patients. I made lots of mistakes and was frustrated a few too many times, because yes I'm only a first year student but you can't prescribe everyone an antibiotic and send them home to die, but else was I supposed to do and how am I supposed to be okay with that. How do you see what I saw today and not be totally ticked at God and ticked at every person in the US. How do you see what I saw and not want to scream or burst into a storm of tears. How do you see what I see and not want to do so much more.
The day went on, I got more confident with my diagnosis, prescriptions, and began to question some of the nurse's decisions and provide valid reasons why (example: not every person who has chest pain has pneumonia, ya gotta look at all the symptoms and listen to your patients). Eventually we stopped for lunch and I switched to do vitals for awhile which was equally as sad, especially when someone comes through with BP of 210/105.
I saw and felt so much today and I honestly can't find the words to explain what I saw or felt.
By the end of the day I was worn, weary, and so confused. I asked the questions I hadn't asked in a long time. "God is good so why. Why is this beautiful place with beautiful people so broken and forgotten about. How is it fair that I will go home and be right in between two quality hospitals." God is good all the time. And all the time, God is good. I may not understand why the world is the way it is, but I do need to understand that He is good and His plan is perfect and He is love. I may not have helped save anyone, but you better believe I tried my best to make sure they knew how loved they are. If I can't help save their earthly life I can help their eternal life. My heart is in shreds.
While today was draining I'm so many ways, I learned a ton! I was diagnosing patients and prescribing meds basically by myself! I do believe God gave me the wisdom I needed to help each patient. He definitely worked in and through me today. I am so small. So naive. Such a child. But I am His creation. He is molding me.
Tuesday- January 23, 2018:
BREAK DAYYYYYY! The Lord knew we were tired and worn from yesterday and today, because of some miscommunication, our clinic was post poned and we had a day to rejuvenate! I woke up around 8 to get ready, eat breakfast, and spend some time with Jesus outside. We all met around 10:45 for highs and lows and devos by the pool. Once we finished all that we went to our favorite "American" restaurant, well as American as you can get in Kenya. The espresso was much appreciated! After eating we headed back to the hotel for some more free time. Most of us changed into our swim suits and hung out by the pool listening to worship music and reading. It was so nice to just relax and soak up the sun. I soaked up a little too much though.. I was fried by the time I went in. The Kenyan sun is very hot. We finished the day with dinner and headed to bed because the next day was clinic day.
Wednesday- January 24, 2018:
We were told today would be a small clinic. Over 300 patients later we were wiped. We arrived at our clinic space around 9 and began our usual set up. I again started off paired with a Kenyan nurse, which quickly took a turn. For about the first 20 minutes, my nurse decided to wander away and leave me to see patients on my own... I was terrified. None of them spoke English, but the Lord stepped in. I only saw 2 patients by myself and thankfully had an interpreter. By the 3rd patient I left the exam room to grab a tongue depressor (to check out some infected tonsils) with the main agenda to either find my nurse or Annie, because there was no way I was about to diagnose and treat patients by myself all day. My nurse didn't quite understand that as a nursing student I could not practice by myself (nor was I comfortable doing so). In Kenya, nurses are aloud to do a lot more than what we do in the states, so I think it was a learning experience for us all. We saw some really cool things today. We saw God at work in many ways.
After we had packed up all of our equipment and were getting ready to leave, a man walked over. He was limping terribly and couldn't move his arm more than about an inch. Dave adjusted him and after some coaxing his arm shot straight up and the limping from the deformed foot was significantly better. God did some really cool things, but I also again some really sad things that wrecked me.
There was a 17 year old girl who came in. We had a mobile clinic that allowed us to do more testing. Upon further testing we discovered this 17 year old girl was 7 months pregnant with cervical cancer and potentially HIV. That poor little baby would not live long enough to see much of the outside world and if that baby did, he/she would have lots of defects. The mom may not survive this who ordeal either, In the U.S., she and her baby had a solid chance, but not in Africa. Another young man- maybe 25, had HIV, malaia, typhoid, and we were treating him for TB. 25, but he will be lucky to live to 30. It's not fair, not at all and I am learning to be okay with that.
Thursday- January 25, 2017:
I'm not ready for the emotions that are going to happen today. Today we are saying goodbye. We didn't have to leave the hotel until 11, but we would be leaving for the last time. I woke up around 7:30 to get ready, pack, grab some breakfast, and do my devos out by the pool one last time. We loaded all of our luggage in our matatu and headed to have lunch at Java one more time. After lunch it was time to head to the school for our closing ceremony. Tears of joy and sadness welled in my eyes the entire time s we listened to the ceremony and as we were presented with gifts from the teachers. "I can't leave. How am I supposed to leave them and this home of mine? Why can't they all come with me? What will their life entail once we leave and once they leave? This is where I am supposed to be right now so why am I leaving?" were a few of the thoughts that ran through my mind as I was embraced with lots of hugs from each teacher. The Swahili goodbye song rang in the background as I soaked up every last bit of my time at St. Jacobs. After the ceremony many of the sweet ones I had come to love so very much came running into my arms and wiping my tears away. "Why are you crying, mozungo? We are going to see you again!" my precious Rebbecca said to me as she wiped my tears and brushed my fallen hair behind my ears. Yes, my honey, you will see me again, which is why these were tears of joy and sadness. Tears of joy because my heart has made a home here and was overflowing from all the love, the joy, the grace, the beauty, and all the goodness God showed me here through the kids, the teachers, and His creation. Tears of joy, because how lucky was I to have found a place that made saying goodbye so incredibly hard. Tears of joy, because oh my goodness their smiles and laughter made my heart skip a beat. Tears of joy, because my heart was so full. SO full of love and joy. But tears of sadness, because 2 weeks had gone way too quickly and it was time to leave. Tears of sadness, because I don't understand. I don't understand why I get to return to America to all the things I have and all the stuff that serves no need, and all the plethora of wastefulness, and they have to stay, where they go to the bathroom in a hole, eat the same meal every day, walk miles to go anywhere, have to conserve water, live in a house that could wash away in the rain, fight disease with out the access to minimal to no health care, and so much more. Tears of sadness because I don't want to leave, mixed in with a few tears of anger, because it is still not fair. Tears of sadness, because my heart was so full, but so shattered and I knew returning home meant i would have to try and piece it back together. My cup is filled, but I have been pushed off the table into a place of brokeness and emotions I don't understand and feelings i can not define yet.
We said our last goodbyes, had one last round of chai and mandazi, and headed to the airport, where we said another painful goodbye to mama. She took such good care of us all and loved us so much. I will miss her dearly.
Our flight from Eldoret to Naiobi left at 8:30 and We were at our hotel by 10. We had dinner quick and headed to bed, because tomorrow would be very early and very long.
Friday- January 26. 2018:
I definitely thought I had food poisoning of some sort, because I only slept maybe 2 hours, because my stomach hurt soooo bad and eventually was accompanied by nausea. A zofran and a few ginger tablets snapped me right out of whatever was going on and I was good to go!
I was up and getting ready by 4:30 am, because we would be leaving for our Safari by 5:45/6 am.
The Safari was SO FREAKING COOL. You better believe we were singing Hakuna Matata from Lion King most of the trip. We saw so many animals roam free in their natural space and not locked in a cage. They were happy and free and so beautiful. God created some amazing creatures. We finished our Safari around 10 and the headed to the Elephant Sanctuary. A rehabilitation center for oprhaned elephants who's parents were killed by poachers or they were injured and left behind. The idea is to eventually release them back to the wild. They were so stinkin cute and oh my goodness I got to pet a freaking elephant and marvel at how unique they are. At the end of our time with the elephants we saw an Ivory burning site/memorial. I never fully realized how terribly poaching is destroying the elephant population. While poaching is very illegal in Africa, it still is happening at a dangerous rate. The ivory elephant memorial is a place where official burn confiscated or found ivory and burn it so that no profit is made from the cruel act of poaching. It was very sad to witness.
By the time we finished up we were all ready for some lunch so we stopped at a "mall" for about an hour and quick ate so we could go to the Giraffe Sancutary. Which was I think, my favorite part of the day, because we got to hang out with giraffes for like 3 hours! We had a brief talk that talked about the different types of giraffes and how many are endangered and the purpose of this sanctuary was to help build the population. Giraffes might be my new favorite animal. Oh yeah, I KISSED A GIRAFFE. No it wasn't weird or gross, okay maybe a little, but I honestly didn't even feel more than a little tickle and there was no saliva that touched my face. I got to spend some time just petting them and marvelling at how large and beautiful they are. It was a good time, that eventually came to an end. We had to leave by for to be at the airport by 5.
We arrived at the airport sometime around 5 and the waiting began. Our flight did not leave until 11 and we couldn't check in until 8, so we made our selves comfy at a coffee shop and I think most of us used our complimentary hour of wifi in the first hour. Since we had time to kill and a long 30 hours of travelling awaited us, many of us took turns going to the restroom to wash our faces, swipe on some more deodorant, and peel out our contacts. We were only at the coffee place for about an hour and half before we were actually able to check in early. We made it through security and everything, found our gate, and settled in to have our debrief. Wow. I'm going to miss seeing these amazing, godly, and loving people everyday. God placed some great new friends in my life and I was truly honored to serve alongside each of them.
Saturday- January 27, 2018:
After 30 hours of travelling and maybe a total of 5 hours of sleep on all three flights I was home. We made it. We did it. Just like that 2 weeks were complete. My wonderful friend Carla picked me up from the airport. I grabbed my suitcase, said a few goodbyes, and we headed back to USF. I'm not gonna lie it felt very weird to drive through town, to be in town general. It felt strange and almost cold (no pun intended). I had been gone awhile and upon arrival I did not want to be back, but I did and I know that makes no sense, but y'all, Kenya ripped a huge chunk of my heart out and it's still there. We arrived at the school at I was greeted by some of my favorite people- my great friend Scott, and Jessie, an RA and friend. You better believe I gave them all giant hugs, because even though I didn't want to come home, I really did miss everyone so much and it did feel good to be back. I handed out a few souvenirs and they listened to a few stories and accepted my weirdness and hyperness due to excitement and lack of sleep. We were going to have a movie night that night so I grabbed a shower (much needed) and went to QDOBA (my first meal back in America) with Carla. I was not the slightest bit tired until after my shower and it hit me like a bus. 30 hours of travelling, a 9 hour time change, and minimal sleep was all catching up to me, but I had to try to get on a normal American schedule again so going to bed before 9 or 10 was out of the question. I managed to watch on movie with some friends and by manage I mean I was dozing off a majority of it. After the first movie I tapped out and I was in bed before 9:30. I was out like a light, because I don't remember falling asleep and I was soundly asleep until my alarm went of at 8:30. I got over 11 hours of sleep and I was still exhausted, but it was Sunday and Sunday is for Jesus so I got up and went to a new church Sunday morning. Church at the Gate was a lovely church and I felt the Spirit all around me this morning. Plus I got to see our fearless group leaders: Dave and Annie, and a new friend, Michelle.
This is where I am going to end for now, because in all honesty is and dragging and the process of understand, absorbing, and processing has not really begun yet, but I will keep you all posted with more stories from Africa, lessons God taught me, and how the recovery is going, I've said it before and I am going to say it again. A mission trip is so much more than sweet pictures, nice stories, and lessons. What we too often forget is that the recovery is brutal. I ask that you keep me and the rest of the team in your prayers as we begin this process. Thank you for your continued support! This trip would not have been possible with out all of you!
Love,
Rebekah
After we had packed up all of our equipment and were getting ready to leave, a man walked over. He was limping terribly and couldn't move his arm more than about an inch. Dave adjusted him and after some coaxing his arm shot straight up and the limping from the deformed foot was significantly better. God did some really cool things, but I also again some really sad things that wrecked me.
There was a 17 year old girl who came in. We had a mobile clinic that allowed us to do more testing. Upon further testing we discovered this 17 year old girl was 7 months pregnant with cervical cancer and potentially HIV. That poor little baby would not live long enough to see much of the outside world and if that baby did, he/she would have lots of defects. The mom may not survive this who ordeal either, In the U.S., she and her baby had a solid chance, but not in Africa. Another young man- maybe 25, had HIV, malaia, typhoid, and we were treating him for TB. 25, but he will be lucky to live to 30. It's not fair, not at all and I am learning to be okay with that.
Thursday- January 25, 2017:
I'm not ready for the emotions that are going to happen today. Today we are saying goodbye. We didn't have to leave the hotel until 11, but we would be leaving for the last time. I woke up around 7:30 to get ready, pack, grab some breakfast, and do my devos out by the pool one last time. We loaded all of our luggage in our matatu and headed to have lunch at Java one more time. After lunch it was time to head to the school for our closing ceremony. Tears of joy and sadness welled in my eyes the entire time s we listened to the ceremony and as we were presented with gifts from the teachers. "I can't leave. How am I supposed to leave them and this home of mine? Why can't they all come with me? What will their life entail once we leave and once they leave? This is where I am supposed to be right now so why am I leaving?" were a few of the thoughts that ran through my mind as I was embraced with lots of hugs from each teacher. The Swahili goodbye song rang in the background as I soaked up every last bit of my time at St. Jacobs. After the ceremony many of the sweet ones I had come to love so very much came running into my arms and wiping my tears away. "Why are you crying, mozungo? We are going to see you again!" my precious Rebbecca said to me as she wiped my tears and brushed my fallen hair behind my ears. Yes, my honey, you will see me again, which is why these were tears of joy and sadness. Tears of joy because my heart has made a home here and was overflowing from all the love, the joy, the grace, the beauty, and all the goodness God showed me here through the kids, the teachers, and His creation. Tears of joy, because how lucky was I to have found a place that made saying goodbye so incredibly hard. Tears of joy, because oh my goodness their smiles and laughter made my heart skip a beat. Tears of joy, because my heart was so full. SO full of love and joy. But tears of sadness, because 2 weeks had gone way too quickly and it was time to leave. Tears of sadness, because I don't understand. I don't understand why I get to return to America to all the things I have and all the stuff that serves no need, and all the plethora of wastefulness, and they have to stay, where they go to the bathroom in a hole, eat the same meal every day, walk miles to go anywhere, have to conserve water, live in a house that could wash away in the rain, fight disease with out the access to minimal to no health care, and so much more. Tears of sadness because I don't want to leave, mixed in with a few tears of anger, because it is still not fair. Tears of sadness, because my heart was so full, but so shattered and I knew returning home meant i would have to try and piece it back together. My cup is filled, but I have been pushed off the table into a place of brokeness and emotions I don't understand and feelings i can not define yet.
We said our last goodbyes, had one last round of chai and mandazi, and headed to the airport, where we said another painful goodbye to mama. She took such good care of us all and loved us so much. I will miss her dearly.
Our flight from Eldoret to Naiobi left at 8:30 and We were at our hotel by 10. We had dinner quick and headed to bed, because tomorrow would be very early and very long.
Friday- January 26. 2018:
I definitely thought I had food poisoning of some sort, because I only slept maybe 2 hours, because my stomach hurt soooo bad and eventually was accompanied by nausea. A zofran and a few ginger tablets snapped me right out of whatever was going on and I was good to go!
I was up and getting ready by 4:30 am, because we would be leaving for our Safari by 5:45/6 am.
The Safari was SO FREAKING COOL. You better believe we were singing Hakuna Matata from Lion King most of the trip. We saw so many animals roam free in their natural space and not locked in a cage. They were happy and free and so beautiful. God created some amazing creatures. We finished our Safari around 10 and the headed to the Elephant Sanctuary. A rehabilitation center for oprhaned elephants who's parents were killed by poachers or they were injured and left behind. The idea is to eventually release them back to the wild. They were so stinkin cute and oh my goodness I got to pet a freaking elephant and marvel at how unique they are. At the end of our time with the elephants we saw an Ivory burning site/memorial. I never fully realized how terribly poaching is destroying the elephant population. While poaching is very illegal in Africa, it still is happening at a dangerous rate. The ivory elephant memorial is a place where official burn confiscated or found ivory and burn it so that no profit is made from the cruel act of poaching. It was very sad to witness.
By the time we finished up we were all ready for some lunch so we stopped at a "mall" for about an hour and quick ate so we could go to the Giraffe Sancutary. Which was I think, my favorite part of the day, because we got to hang out with giraffes for like 3 hours! We had a brief talk that talked about the different types of giraffes and how many are endangered and the purpose of this sanctuary was to help build the population. Giraffes might be my new favorite animal. Oh yeah, I KISSED A GIRAFFE. No it wasn't weird or gross, okay maybe a little, but I honestly didn't even feel more than a little tickle and there was no saliva that touched my face. I got to spend some time just petting them and marvelling at how large and beautiful they are. It was a good time, that eventually came to an end. We had to leave by for to be at the airport by 5.
We arrived at the airport sometime around 5 and the waiting began. Our flight did not leave until 11 and we couldn't check in until 8, so we made our selves comfy at a coffee shop and I think most of us used our complimentary hour of wifi in the first hour. Since we had time to kill and a long 30 hours of travelling awaited us, many of us took turns going to the restroom to wash our faces, swipe on some more deodorant, and peel out our contacts. We were only at the coffee place for about an hour and half before we were actually able to check in early. We made it through security and everything, found our gate, and settled in to have our debrief. Wow. I'm going to miss seeing these amazing, godly, and loving people everyday. God placed some great new friends in my life and I was truly honored to serve alongside each of them.
Saturday- January 27, 2018:
After 30 hours of travelling and maybe a total of 5 hours of sleep on all three flights I was home. We made it. We did it. Just like that 2 weeks were complete. My wonderful friend Carla picked me up from the airport. I grabbed my suitcase, said a few goodbyes, and we headed back to USF. I'm not gonna lie it felt very weird to drive through town, to be in town general. It felt strange and almost cold (no pun intended). I had been gone awhile and upon arrival I did not want to be back, but I did and I know that makes no sense, but y'all, Kenya ripped a huge chunk of my heart out and it's still there. We arrived at the school at I was greeted by some of my favorite people- my great friend Scott, and Jessie, an RA and friend. You better believe I gave them all giant hugs, because even though I didn't want to come home, I really did miss everyone so much and it did feel good to be back. I handed out a few souvenirs and they listened to a few stories and accepted my weirdness and hyperness due to excitement and lack of sleep. We were going to have a movie night that night so I grabbed a shower (much needed) and went to QDOBA (my first meal back in America) with Carla. I was not the slightest bit tired until after my shower and it hit me like a bus. 30 hours of travelling, a 9 hour time change, and minimal sleep was all catching up to me, but I had to try to get on a normal American schedule again so going to bed before 9 or 10 was out of the question. I managed to watch on movie with some friends and by manage I mean I was dozing off a majority of it. After the first movie I tapped out and I was in bed before 9:30. I was out like a light, because I don't remember falling asleep and I was soundly asleep until my alarm went of at 8:30. I got over 11 hours of sleep and I was still exhausted, but it was Sunday and Sunday is for Jesus so I got up and went to a new church Sunday morning. Church at the Gate was a lovely church and I felt the Spirit all around me this morning. Plus I got to see our fearless group leaders: Dave and Annie, and a new friend, Michelle.
This is where I am going to end for now, because in all honesty is and dragging and the process of understand, absorbing, and processing has not really begun yet, but I will keep you all posted with more stories from Africa, lessons God taught me, and how the recovery is going, I've said it before and I am going to say it again. A mission trip is so much more than sweet pictures, nice stories, and lessons. What we too often forget is that the recovery is brutal. I ask that you keep me and the rest of the team in your prayers as we begin this process. Thank you for your continued support! This trip would not have been possible with out all of you!
Love,
Rebekah
Friday, January 19, 2018
When Stories and Pictures Become Reality- The Adventures of Africa
Tuesday- January 16, 2018:
Wednesday- January 17, 2018:
Woah. Between Monday and today we saw over 420 patients. It was so cool to be able to see miracles and interact with the villagers. Most of them only spoke Swahili and a few spoke so broken English. Today was incredible. I bounced between vitals and wound care again today, but I also had the opportunity to sit in on evaluations with a Kenyan doctor and I was blown away. Being a comforting presence while I was taking vitals or bandaging wounds was really great and I know God uses me in some way through that, but being able to watch the diagnostic process was so cool! The Physician I sat it on would get all the information from the patient and then translate back to me what they said and then he would tell me what he thought the diagnosis was and the treatments for it. He often asked, “you agree yes?” “Yeah of course!” Yeah I actually was clueless on some.. a lot of the process, especially since they treat things differently here. I was also saddened by many things I saw and heard. I watched the diagnosis process of diseases that are rare or even unheard of in the US, like Typhoid, tuberculosis, and hepatitis. Diseases that you hear are an issue and affecting many, but it’s not you or anyone you know so it’s not an issue right? Wrong- these are real life illnesses many in third world countries are beings diagnosed with every day and there are those who are losing their fight every day as well. These people are sick and need help, but they have no means to the help they need. It’s very very sad but it was a privilege to serve them today. Even if our clinic was in the middle of a field and not the most sterile environment on a hot day, God moves mountains and did cool things. He is so good.
Thursday-January 18, 2018:
God is hitting me bard with a lot and I'm sure He will continue to do so. Today I am thinking back to all the lessons on Africa and poverty we had and how those lecturing me about Africa were so wrong. Africa is more than a large desert with a water shortage and elephamts. Its more than lions, zebras, and elephants. And it's definitely more than many of the names and labels it is given. Yes Africa is filled with poverty, but I'm pretty sure if you were in the same position that is not how you would want to be known. So let's look at the beauty of this amazing land. In Africa you will see some of the coolest animals- not in a zoo, and experience not only desert, but also mountains. There are warm days filled with low humidity. While the scenery is beautiful, the weather gorgeous, and the driving terrifying, the people are really what makes me fall in love with this land a little more everyday. They always welcome anyone and everyone with open hearts and open arms. They love unconditionally and care just as deeply. Though in pain, they see yours and help you. They give what they have, even if its only a single chipatii. They work hard with out a single complaint. They are never on time (perfect for me). They have the most beautiful smiles and the best stories. They are genuine. I could continue, but I can not fully describe how incredible these children of God are. Sorry mom but I dont want to leave.
Africa is nothing like I was taught. It was so underappreciated.
Today we went on our first home visit, which is where a sponsor gets to meet and see the living area of their sponsored child. Our visit today was a little over an hour away in Nandi Hills. This meeting and ceremony left me wrapped in the love and faithfulness of my savior and not a single dry eye. The ceremony begins by first meeting the family. They sponsor then washes the feet of the child and their parents as a leader reads passage from John. It is truly a humbling and touching moment. Once the feet are washed, the family receives a bag filled with groceries. This visit was so moving. I saw the slums of the towns. I saw a family trying its very best to provide and survive and its as if all the odds were stacked against them. Poverty is a wicked beast, but the greed that creates it is even worse.
After the house visit we headed down the mountain where we stopped at a public school. tattered uniforms, uneven broken ground, run down buildings, old curriculum, broke desks, big smiles, and lots of love are some of the sights I saw at the public school. My heart once again broke, knowing that if these kids aren't sponsored they won't receive an education passed 8th grade and the education they are receiving is not good..
After the school we went to a tea farm and had a tour of both the field and the factory. SO COOl. After that we stopped for a quick bite to eat and went back to the hotel. Tomorrow is going to be a crazy day as we have the village clinic. We were originally told to expect like 300, but now it's more like 700. We are praying for God's wisdom, strength, love, joy and glory through this day!
Wednesday- January 17, 2018:
Woah. Between Monday and today we saw over 420 patients. It was so cool to be able to see miracles and interact with the villagers. Most of them only spoke Swahili and a few spoke so broken English. Today was incredible. I bounced between vitals and wound care again today, but I also had the opportunity to sit in on evaluations with a Kenyan doctor and I was blown away. Being a comforting presence while I was taking vitals or bandaging wounds was really great and I know God uses me in some way through that, but being able to watch the diagnostic process was so cool! The Physician I sat it on would get all the information from the patient and then translate back to me what they said and then he would tell me what he thought the diagnosis was and the treatments for it. He often asked, “you agree yes?” “Yeah of course!” Yeah I actually was clueless on some.. a lot of the process, especially since they treat things differently here. I was also saddened by many things I saw and heard. I watched the diagnosis process of diseases that are rare or even unheard of in the US, like Typhoid, tuberculosis, and hepatitis. Diseases that you hear are an issue and affecting many, but it’s not you or anyone you know so it’s not an issue right? Wrong- these are real life illnesses many in third world countries are beings diagnosed with every day and there are those who are losing their fight every day as well. These people are sick and need help, but they have no means to the help they need. It’s very very sad but it was a privilege to serve them today. Even if our clinic was in the middle of a field and not the most sterile environment on a hot day, God moves mountains and did cool things. He is so good.
Thursday-January 18, 2018:
It’s Thursday already?! We’re almost half way through with our trip?! I’m already a little sad and dreading leaving this amazing place that I have come to love so very much. God willing I will return very soon.
Today was off to a rough start- we were to leave the hotel at 8:30 (Kenyan time), which meant 9, but left more around 12:30. One of our team members( a very sweet mom who we all adore) had her babe stolen at breakfast. After searching all the grounds and reviewing the tape, they knew who stole it and had the license plate number and they will hopefully track them down. Andy (the mom) handled this situation with such grace and was just so thankful we were all okay. We also had a couple other members get sick, we think it was just because all of the food and newness, but let’s pray it passes quickly and everyone stays healthy and happy.
When we left the hotel we headed to the government office where we met the governor and head of the health department, to talk about the clinic we did yesterday. It was a little strange but kinda cool at the same time. After the meeting we went to Java- a restraint and coffee shop where we had some more “American” food and ESPRESSO! Yayay! I love coffee and have missed it!
When we finished up at Java we headed to the rescue center. A place for children who are addicted to huffing glue and really anything. It’s also a place of refuge for kids who have been abused, ran away, and even a couple who have been shunned do to an illness. Someone needs to buy me some tape, because this place shattered my heart.. I don’t think I have ever felt so broken in my life. These kids. I.. I can’t explain the hopelessness I saw in there eyes, because they know that after the center, they have nothing and no one to return to. They do not have a school and so many of them will never be able to go to school and even if they did, many would not have the scores to continue on to higher education. They were so timid. You could tell they’ve had it rough. They have seen and felt things many of us could not imagine. They’ve been hurt and they are scared to let love in. I found a little boy who stole my heart. I haven’t stopped thinking about him since I left. He spoke not English and little Swahili. I knew little about him except that his name was Edwin Kipchoonga. He took some convincing but once he decided I was okay, he latched on to me. I taught him a form of patty cake, gave him lots of hugs, and of course had a tickle war. Oh wow did he steal a big piece of my heart. Saying goodbye and leaving him.. my heart shattered and shattered again. This place was so run down, but had so much potential if they had the funds. Many of the children have no beds, wear the same clothes day after day, and have not schedule. If you want to know more please feel free to ask, but because this has come near to my heart, this is all that I will publicly share.
When we left the rescue center, we had another home visit. So very touching again. This young boy, Walter, was being raised by his grandma. I think the most heart warming part was, she made us all chai tea. She told us her cow was dry and only gave her a cup and a half of milk so she prayed God would bless it and make it enough. She spent 50 shillings to buy tea leaves and she used the last of her sugar to make it. God blessed her tea- it was enough for all 13 of us that were there and extra for her neighbors. She told us many stories and showed extreme gratitude. She had almost nothing, but gave what she had to make us feel so welcome. Today was an adventure that’s for sure!! I also got to sit in on a class at St. Jacobs. Those kids are so smart and so well behaved!! Seriously, the teacher could leave the classroom and the student teaching would continue and they would remain attentive the entire time. They respect and value their education so much. I just love them all so dearly! They have stolen my heart.
Today wa crazy but I am really enjoying getting to know everyone on the team! Dinner was filled with lots of great conversation and I am blessed to be apart of this incredible team.
Tomorrow we are head to a waterfall and other adventures I will write about later!
Prayer Requests:
- Safety- always a good precaution
- Health- we are all feeling worn and a little under the weather
- Hearts- my is growing and God is working. Pray He continues to work in me/my life and teach me many lessons while here
Tuesday, January 16, 2018
Karibu To Africa-The Adventures of Africa
Thursday- January 11, 2018- Friday 12. 2018
JAMBO!! Thursday and Friday were two days jam packed with lots of traveling. Like 26 hours to be exact! We gathered at the Sioux Falls air port at around 12:30 when we checked our luggage in, got our tickets, and prayed before heading through security. Once we all made it through security we had a little time to kill before our first flight to Chicago departed at around 2:50 pm. Two hours later we landed in Chicago and rushed to find our gate. Our next flight departed from Chicago to Frankfurt Germany for an 8 hour flight. Once in Frankfurt we booked it to catch our next flight that would take us to Nairobi!! This was a 9.5 hour flight.. so let’s just say by the time we landed and were done flying, our legs felt like stiff jello and were blown up like balloons. I was so glad to be on solid ground and to be able to stand. Once we landed in Nairobi we walked down the steps of the plane to the outside( yep you read that right no terminal), went inside and headed through immigration. After making it through immigration we proceeded through customs again and then packed everything into our vans and began the drive to our hotel that we would stay the night at. We arrived at the Biblica House at 1:30 am(Kenya time) Here in the beautiful land of Kenya we are 9 hours ahead of Nebraska and South Dakota, which is taking some getting used to. Upon arrival at the hotel, we unloaded our bags and they fed us “dinner” which consisted of rice, beef, chicken, sweet potatoes(way different than the US), and fresh fruit. It was soooooo gooooodddd!! I also tried Kenyan ginger ale- bad idea.. One of the hotel workers told me before I drank it, “take it slow it’s very strong” yeah she wasn’t wrong...
Saturday- January 13, 2018:
Not much sleep happened Friday night. I think it was because I was so anxious and excited about so many unknowns that today would hold. I also maybe slept a total of 3-4 hours the entire travel time (for those of you who wonder what you do when your stuck on a plane and can’t sleep you watch, “The Lion King” twice, and then watch about 5 other movies and then read an entire book) Anyway, back to Saturday- we woke up and had a lovely breakfast of fresh fruit, cereal, sausage(?), hard boiled eggs, kale, and a tortilla pancake type thing that I can not remember the name of. And of course fresh passion fruit juice and coffee. We hung out a little bit, before starting the (supposedly) 6 hour drive to Eldoret. Along the way we got to see so many of the beauties of Africa- from trees and plants to the bright red dirt. Let’s not forget about the wild animals we saw such as zebras, baboons, and antelope. We stopped at an over look sight to see part of the Rift Valley and then also stopped at the equator. Even though our trip lasted more like 8 hours as opposed to 6 we were able to see and experience so much. So much beauty and so much chaos. Speaking of chaos, anyone who thinks I am a terrible drivers can no longer give an opinion, because oh my goodness there are no rules for driving here and no space limit. I’m pretty we almost got in like 20 accidents and the bumps were so bumpy but hey we survived it!! Also I am currently on a strike of eating meat from anywhere that I do not know, because at one of our stops there was a butcher shop in the restaurant and I’m just gonna stop there.. I saw a lot of beauty today but I also saw so much poverty and heart ache. Just from driving, I could see the pain they are feeling.. I saw a mom swaddling a baby on her back, yet carrying jugs of water. I saw broken roads and run down shacks. Places o would never imagine as a livable place, were the homes for many. You see picture on the news and on google of the poverty of Africa, but it will never fully hit you until you see it through your own eyes. I know I have just scratched to surface of the pain of this nation, but y’all, my eyes and my heart saw so much today. I much. I can not even put into words all that I saw nor can I describe how I am feeling. I have a lot to saw, but not right now. Honduras hit me hard, but I think Kenya is hitting me even harder. It’s gonna hurt a lot more than what I felt today, but God is gonna do some cool things.
This has nothing to do with what I’m talking about, but it hit me pretty hard- I peed in a hole today. Whil I was disgusted and slightly confused, the natives did it with not problem. They probably have no idea what they are missing out on which made my heart hurt.
Once we arrived in Eldoret we went to mamas house. She is the director of the school we will have clinics at as well as a very important person to SIMBA ministry. She was so sweet and it was nice to enjoy some more homemade Kenyan food and chat with each other. We were all so exhausted that not much talking took place, but we did enjoy our time! Tomorrow we are headed to church and then to set up the school for the clinics. Once set and ready to go, the rest of the time we get to hang out with the kiddos and love on them. My heart is SO ready to shower so much love on them!
Sunday- January 14, 2018:
Today was our first day at the school and I am at a loss for words.
We started the morning with breakfast and devos at the hotel and then headed to St. Jacobs School. On the way I saw a level of poverty I have heard about and seen pictures of but never fully grasped the depth of it until I looked into the eyes of many as we passed by. Tattered and broken, they continue to push forward. The culture here is beautiful. I wish you could see the images I have engraved in my mind, because the ones I took on my iPhone don’t even come close to how shattered this world is or how beautiful it is. While there is so much loss there is still so much gain for them. So much hope and so much joy.
Upon arrival at the school we heard singing and welcoming from the students. They were so excited to see us! My heart felt in that moment of first meeting them. We received a tour of the school and then proceeded into one of the main buildings for a church service. Half of the service was in Swahili and the other half in English. They put so much passion into their worship and sermons that it’s hard for one to not feel the Holy Spirit during a service after two hours of church and introduction we finally had time to meet and play with the kiddos and I have never felt so loved ever! I met this sweet little girl named Rebbecca and of course we bonded right away. She never left my side the entire day. Something tells me I’m going to have a very hard time leaving. My heart loves this beautiful place so so so much. After hangining our with the children’s we headed back to our hotel for dinner, met for devos and then we headed to bed.
Monday- January 15, 2018:
WOW!
I can’t not begin to describe to you how incredible today was! We met at 8:99 am for breakfast and devotions. We were supposed to leave for the clinic at 8:30, but that was not Kenyan time 😉 our driver did not arrive until 9:15. We piled in the matatus and drove the 20-30 minutes to, St. Jacobs. Once we arrived, we began to set up for the clinic. Today we would see 176 of the students. By the time we finish setting up for the clinic it was tea time so we had chai and then it was officially time to start the clinic. My areas for today were vitals and wound care. During vitals I did the basics: Temperature, pulse, oxygen, respirations, and a few blood pressures. Wound care today was basically cuts and scrapes with a few mystery cases. A few kiddos, one boy who was especially bad, had these, I’m not exactly sure what they were, but open wounds that would harden over. They did not look nor smell pretty. I think that little boy is very sick. We have potentially ruled out diabetes, but it could be possibly something cardiovascular.
My heart aches for these kids. As we exams them and patched them up they were so scared. Many of them have never ever been to or seen a nurse or doctor and they were absolutely terrified. I had to constantly re assure them that they were okay and that we were going to take very good care of them. They were all so prescious and I am so excited to continue my schooling as a nurse. I’m so ready to serve in this way!
Getting to interact with all the kids and play nurse for a day got me so freaking pumped to become a nurse! I also had some time to play with a lot of the kids. We played a game where they would sneak up on me and I would turn around and run around and chase them. It was so fun, but I biffed it hard at one point. I laughed it off, but I’m a definitely a little sore. Tomorrow we go on our first house visit to see a sponsored child, but for now I am headed to bed, because I am exhausted.
Prayer Requests:
JAMBO!! Thursday and Friday were two days jam packed with lots of traveling. Like 26 hours to be exact! We gathered at the Sioux Falls air port at around 12:30 when we checked our luggage in, got our tickets, and prayed before heading through security. Once we all made it through security we had a little time to kill before our first flight to Chicago departed at around 2:50 pm. Two hours later we landed in Chicago and rushed to find our gate. Our next flight departed from Chicago to Frankfurt Germany for an 8 hour flight. Once in Frankfurt we booked it to catch our next flight that would take us to Nairobi!! This was a 9.5 hour flight.. so let’s just say by the time we landed and were done flying, our legs felt like stiff jello and were blown up like balloons. I was so glad to be on solid ground and to be able to stand. Once we landed in Nairobi we walked down the steps of the plane to the outside( yep you read that right no terminal), went inside and headed through immigration. After making it through immigration we proceeded through customs again and then packed everything into our vans and began the drive to our hotel that we would stay the night at. We arrived at the Biblica House at 1:30 am(Kenya time) Here in the beautiful land of Kenya we are 9 hours ahead of Nebraska and South Dakota, which is taking some getting used to. Upon arrival at the hotel, we unloaded our bags and they fed us “dinner” which consisted of rice, beef, chicken, sweet potatoes(way different than the US), and fresh fruit. It was soooooo gooooodddd!! I also tried Kenyan ginger ale- bad idea.. One of the hotel workers told me before I drank it, “take it slow it’s very strong” yeah she wasn’t wrong...
Saturday- January 13, 2018:
Not much sleep happened Friday night. I think it was because I was so anxious and excited about so many unknowns that today would hold. I also maybe slept a total of 3-4 hours the entire travel time (for those of you who wonder what you do when your stuck on a plane and can’t sleep you watch, “The Lion King” twice, and then watch about 5 other movies and then read an entire book) Anyway, back to Saturday- we woke up and had a lovely breakfast of fresh fruit, cereal, sausage(?), hard boiled eggs, kale, and a tortilla pancake type thing that I can not remember the name of. And of course fresh passion fruit juice and coffee. We hung out a little bit, before starting the (supposedly) 6 hour drive to Eldoret. Along the way we got to see so many of the beauties of Africa- from trees and plants to the bright red dirt. Let’s not forget about the wild animals we saw such as zebras, baboons, and antelope. We stopped at an over look sight to see part of the Rift Valley and then also stopped at the equator. Even though our trip lasted more like 8 hours as opposed to 6 we were able to see and experience so much. So much beauty and so much chaos. Speaking of chaos, anyone who thinks I am a terrible drivers can no longer give an opinion, because oh my goodness there are no rules for driving here and no space limit. I’m pretty we almost got in like 20 accidents and the bumps were so bumpy but hey we survived it!! Also I am currently on a strike of eating meat from anywhere that I do not know, because at one of our stops there was a butcher shop in the restaurant and I’m just gonna stop there.. I saw a lot of beauty today but I also saw so much poverty and heart ache. Just from driving, I could see the pain they are feeling.. I saw a mom swaddling a baby on her back, yet carrying jugs of water. I saw broken roads and run down shacks. Places o would never imagine as a livable place, were the homes for many. You see picture on the news and on google of the poverty of Africa, but it will never fully hit you until you see it through your own eyes. I know I have just scratched to surface of the pain of this nation, but y’all, my eyes and my heart saw so much today. I much. I can not even put into words all that I saw nor can I describe how I am feeling. I have a lot to saw, but not right now. Honduras hit me hard, but I think Kenya is hitting me even harder. It’s gonna hurt a lot more than what I felt today, but God is gonna do some cool things.
This has nothing to do with what I’m talking about, but it hit me pretty hard- I peed in a hole today. Whil I was disgusted and slightly confused, the natives did it with not problem. They probably have no idea what they are missing out on which made my heart hurt.
Once we arrived in Eldoret we went to mamas house. She is the director of the school we will have clinics at as well as a very important person to SIMBA ministry. She was so sweet and it was nice to enjoy some more homemade Kenyan food and chat with each other. We were all so exhausted that not much talking took place, but we did enjoy our time! Tomorrow we are headed to church and then to set up the school for the clinics. Once set and ready to go, the rest of the time we get to hang out with the kiddos and love on them. My heart is SO ready to shower so much love on them!
Sunday- January 14, 2018:
Today was our first day at the school and I am at a loss for words.
We started the morning with breakfast and devos at the hotel and then headed to St. Jacobs School. On the way I saw a level of poverty I have heard about and seen pictures of but never fully grasped the depth of it until I looked into the eyes of many as we passed by. Tattered and broken, they continue to push forward. The culture here is beautiful. I wish you could see the images I have engraved in my mind, because the ones I took on my iPhone don’t even come close to how shattered this world is or how beautiful it is. While there is so much loss there is still so much gain for them. So much hope and so much joy.
Upon arrival at the school we heard singing and welcoming from the students. They were so excited to see us! My heart felt in that moment of first meeting them. We received a tour of the school and then proceeded into one of the main buildings for a church service. Half of the service was in Swahili and the other half in English. They put so much passion into their worship and sermons that it’s hard for one to not feel the Holy Spirit during a service after two hours of church and introduction we finally had time to meet and play with the kiddos and I have never felt so loved ever! I met this sweet little girl named Rebbecca and of course we bonded right away. She never left my side the entire day. Something tells me I’m going to have a very hard time leaving. My heart loves this beautiful place so so so much. After hangining our with the children’s we headed back to our hotel for dinner, met for devos and then we headed to bed.
Monday- January 15, 2018:
WOW!
I can’t not begin to describe to you how incredible today was! We met at 8:99 am for breakfast and devotions. We were supposed to leave for the clinic at 8:30, but that was not Kenyan time 😉 our driver did not arrive until 9:15. We piled in the matatus and drove the 20-30 minutes to, St. Jacobs. Once we arrived, we began to set up for the clinic. Today we would see 176 of the students. By the time we finish setting up for the clinic it was tea time so we had chai and then it was officially time to start the clinic. My areas for today were vitals and wound care. During vitals I did the basics: Temperature, pulse, oxygen, respirations, and a few blood pressures. Wound care today was basically cuts and scrapes with a few mystery cases. A few kiddos, one boy who was especially bad, had these, I’m not exactly sure what they were, but open wounds that would harden over. They did not look nor smell pretty. I think that little boy is very sick. We have potentially ruled out diabetes, but it could be possibly something cardiovascular.
My heart aches for these kids. As we exams them and patched them up they were so scared. Many of them have never ever been to or seen a nurse or doctor and they were absolutely terrified. I had to constantly re assure them that they were okay and that we were going to take very good care of them. They were all so prescious and I am so excited to continue my schooling as a nurse. I’m so ready to serve in this way!
Getting to interact with all the kids and play nurse for a day got me so freaking pumped to become a nurse! I also had some time to play with a lot of the kids. We played a game where they would sneak up on me and I would turn around and run around and chase them. It was so fun, but I biffed it hard at one point. I laughed it off, but I’m a definitely a little sore. Tomorrow we go on our first house visit to see a sponsored child, but for now I am headed to bed, because I am exhausted.
Prayer Requests:
- My grandpa was not doing well at all when I left, so please pray for his health and our family as well
- For the kids we meet and their hearts
- That God gives us peace under all the chaos and wisdom to help heal these beautiful people
- For our hearts: that God reaches us so much, breaks our hearts, and help us to love dangerously
- For all of our energy levels- we’re starting to feel the lack of sleep and long days
- For health- I’m starting to feel not the greatest and I know others aren’t doing so well either
Friday, December 29, 2017
T-312 Hours.. or Something Like That- The Adventures of Africa
18720 Minutes.
312 Hours.
13 Days.
13 Days until I am off on another adventure. I'm not sure I have officially publicly announced this, but for those of you who do not know- in 312 hours I will be arriving at the Sioux Falls airport to board a plane with 17 others to embark on an a medical mission trip to Nairobi, Kenya in Africa! God unfortunately shut the door for me to return to Honduras this January, but not with out opening this window wide open first. I could not be more excited for this incredible opportunity to serve, but before I go to into detail I need to be real with y'all, because I need your prayer.
As a large majority of you reading this know, last year I was humbled to have the amazing chance to travel to Siguatepeque, Honduras for an entire month. While there I taught and assisted in teaching Kindergarten- 4th grade at a bilingual school, orphanage, and clinic. I absorbed the Honduran culture with my host family and we traveled to smaller villages like Puran and helped start gardens for some of the poorest of the poor. I could talk about my time in Honduras forever and how I did this and that, but in all reality I did not do a single thing. God broke me so incredibly hard and all the work that was done and any lives that were changed were all because of God. He is so faithful and so good. Upon returning to the United States I struggled for a long time with things that I experienced while in Honduras. I struggled with adjusting to life in the United States again and with understanding why I got to return to the U.S. and my sweet little 4th grader who lived in a mud hut with her family and ate dirt had to stay. How is it fair that I am so wasteful with water and food and have a plethora, while my sweet kids, they could never imagine some the things I eat nor could the imagine all the water i use. I struggled hard and I still am to some extent. God did an incredible work in my heart and opened my eyes to so many things, but it was not easy and it was very painful, but the joy He has given my heart and the passion He has filled it with makes it all so worth it.
Back to the main point: I would love if you would all please keep me and the rest of the team in your prayers as we take this 2 week long journey. I ask you pray for our hearts to be open and accepting as we enter this country, for the callouses on our hearts to be broken down and ready to grow in so many ways, for all barriers surrounding our hearts to be torn down so that we can love deeply and dangerously, for the culture shock as we enter a new world, and for all of who we are as we return to the States, because i know first hand that the recovery can be brutal. We appreciate you all SO much and are SO thankful for you! This trip would not be possible with out all of your support.
I'm sure a lot of you are still wondering what exactly we will be doing. Upon arrival in Kenya, we will land in Narobi and later travel to Eldoret as well as smaller villages along the way. We will be doing all sorts of stuff that I can better update you all on as it happens, but our main goal is to share the gospel and pray for every patient and family that walks into our clinic. We will also provide medical care to as many as possible, working along side Kenyan doctors and nurses. I am so incredibly stoked and ready to love on all the people of Africa while learning how to become a nurse. For those who I have not shared my goals with, I am currently majoring in nursing and minoring in biology and psychology at the University of Sioux Falls. Once graduated I intend to continue on to receive my nurse practitioners liscense, practice in the States for a couple years and then spend a portion of my life travelling as a missionary nurse, which is another reason i am so hyped for this trip! God has been so good and so faithful. I can not wait to update y'all as much as possible and share with you what God is doing. As before I ask that you please be patient with updates as wifi is not as reliable, but I will try my very best to post a weekly overview! Please feel free to contact me with any questions or just to chat, I would love to hear from you!
Here are other ways to follow my trip/ contact me:
Blog: You are already here :)
Facebook: Bekah Henderson
Snapchat: bek1616
Instagram: rebekah_raielle
Email: rebekah.henderson@usiouxfalls.edu OR rrhenderson16@gmail.com
Call/Text: 402-806-6276
In Christ and with much love,
Rebekah
Saturday, December 2, 2017
Here I am- The Adventures to Africa
Growing up, I always heard the phrase, "Be careful what you wish for" and would always roll my eyes at it. I think a better phrase would be, "Be careful what you prayer for", because God might take it in a direction you never knew was possible. I had often thought about the idea of mission work or becoming a missionary growing up, but at that age I am not sure I fully understood what that meant. I remember watching my oldest brother travel to Louisiana after hurricane Katrina to help with the clean and not too many years after that I remember watching him go to Grenada and help build a school. I watched my other two brothers travel to Mississippi and teach VBS in one of the poorest counties it the nation. I remember watching two important people in my life travel to Uganda and India. I had a strong sense of pride every time one of them left on a trip, yet my heart was aching. "Why can't I go yet? When will it finally be my turn?" I patiently watched and waited each time until finally my time came. My eighth grade year I traveled to Carey, Mississippi for the first time, to help teach VBS and to give lots of love to those sweet kids. I then went back 3 more times. My final trip there, while I knew it would more than likely be my final time there, I knew God had something bigger in store, but I did not realize how big it was until after I had returned home. In September of 2016 I blindly purchased a ticket to Honduras not knowing much about what I would do, but basically only knowing where I would be staying and at the time, I had never met the people I was going to stay with, but nonetheless, On December 28th, 2016 I left all that I knew and all that was "comfortable", hopped on a plane, and landed in San Pedro Sula, Honduras where I met my host family for the first time. I was all alone in a foreign country and I was terrified, but not worried about a single things, because it was God and me. I spent almost a month living in Siguatipeque, Honduras teaching kindergarten, 1st grade, 3rd grade, and 4th grade at a bilingual school, orphanage, and clinic. I also went with my host family into one of the poorer communities called Puran. This trip broke me so hard and my heart and mind were left in many pieces, but I can not begin to describe how much this trip taught me and how much I grew while I was there and while I adjusted back to the U.S. If I had not put every ounce of trust in God while in Honduras, I honestly believe that I would not be here today. While I felt guilty and empty when I returned I was filled with love and joy and thankfulness, and a burning passion to continue to be Jesus' hands and feet.
The original plan was to return to siguat in January of 2018, but sadly those plans fell through, but for really good reasons. I had become content with staying in the states and maybe travelling to another state or staying at a friends house when the first week of school God placed an offer in front of me that I could not say no to. So on January 11th, 2018 I will be travelling to Kenya, Africa on a 16 day medical mission trip. God has blessed me in HUGE ways and I can not wait to see how He uses this trip. SO much has changed in a year(too much to share in one post, but I would love to share so feel free to ask).
In 40 days I will travel with an amazing group of people to share the gospel and assist in giving medical care to the beautiful people of Africa. Y'all my heart is so anxious and I can not believe how good God has been. He's moving mountains everyday!
I will try my best to update y'all as much as possible, but for now here is how you can pray:
Please pray for:
The original plan was to return to siguat in January of 2018, but sadly those plans fell through, but for really good reasons. I had become content with staying in the states and maybe travelling to another state or staying at a friends house when the first week of school God placed an offer in front of me that I could not say no to. So on January 11th, 2018 I will be travelling to Kenya, Africa on a 16 day medical mission trip. God has blessed me in HUGE ways and I can not wait to see how He uses this trip. SO much has changed in a year(too much to share in one post, but I would love to share so feel free to ask).
In 40 days I will travel with an amazing group of people to share the gospel and assist in giving medical care to the beautiful people of Africa. Y'all my heart is so anxious and I can not believe how good God has been. He's moving mountains everyday!
I will try my best to update y'all as much as possible, but for now here is how you can pray:
Please pray for:
- My health and the health of the team
- My heart, the hearts of the team, and the hearts of the African people
- Safe travels and safety while there
- That God continues to break me to grow me
Monday, October 16, 2017
A Piece of My Heart- Honduras
I have been avoiding finishing this post, because I still don't want to believe that I am home. Don't get me wrong, I love Beatrice and Sioux Falls, but I left so much of my heart back in Honduras. Seriously, I have had the airline website opened on my computer ready to press, "purchase" at least a thousand times since I have been back. I have this strange feeling I'm working through with God. I absolutely love USF and so many of the people here, but yet a part of me wants to drop everything and teach in Honduras. The logical side of me says that would not be wise to do right now. Not now, but maybe some day. Anyway here is a brief catch up on my last week in Honduras (only eight months later... better late than never right?)
Monday 01/16/17:
I am still in disbelief that I was starting my last week here. It was a weird time, because I spent so much time missing things like, hot water, heat, wifi, cell service, friends, and so many other things most here wouldn't dream of having, but I didn't miss them anymore. I spent a solid week wanting to change my ticket, only to wanting to stay even longer. I spent too much time thinking about my friends in the U.S. and all that I was missing out on, that I would sometimes forget to make my own memories. The last week. I wasn't ready. I was up at 5 am with the dumb geckos. But I laid in bed under my mosquito net for awhile. "Lord where are you taking me. What are you teaching me". You see, I had high hopes of being totally changed by this trip and at this point, I felt slightly like a failure still. "Did I even really do anything?" I was not sure what I had learned and I didn't know until I arrived back in the states and it hit me so hard. I spent an hour sitting a talking to God and wrestling with the fact that I was leaving in 5 days. At 6 I finally scrambled out of bed to shower and get ready before breakfast at 6:45. This week would be a little different, because it was exam week. We ate breakfast and I was headed to school where as usual, I was attacked with lots of hugs from my sweet little kids. I was with first grade for that day. They had a few tests and then watched a movie in Spanish (which I actually understood quite a bit of it!) that afternoon I went into town with Job to run errands and then we headed to Puran. As we walked up the mountain I ran into a few kids I had come to know quite well. I met them on my first day and saw them every time I went to Puran. They were the sweetest. I love them. A lot. I got a little teary eyed realizing that I would only see them a couple more times before I would return home. Puran has a special place in my heart. Those who live there have nothing. They barely have water to drink and food to eat, yet they have so much joy and love. As I looked around I had many thoughts run through my head. We are so incredibly fortunate to live in the United States and to have all the things we would consider simple or even necessities. I have shoes on my feet, more than one place to call home, food to eat, water to drink whenever and almost wherever I want, clean clothes to wear every day, and so much more.
After we had visited Puran and made the drive back home. We arrived home at around 6 and of course it was already dark, but I walked across to my room and grabbed what I needed to take a quick shower and then headed to the "shower room". As I was in the middle of showering I heard a *plop* and let out a large gasp. I turned around and saw it... Another stinking gecko. Ya'll they are everywhere!! I stomped my foot and it slithered up the wall and out side. I quickly washed the soap out of my hair, threw on my clothes and ran to Job and Adria's house. We ate dinner and talked over things that were going on. Wifi was still iffy and was still not 100% sure how my mom was or even if she was still in the hospital. There was also another bump in the road. There were certain papers I had to get signed and notarized in order to get back into the U.S safely and with out trouble, which I had, but they were only signed by my mom which could potentially be a problem. There was also a good chance there would be another paper that would need to be signed and notarized. With my mom in the hospital and my dad not even living with us, this small incident became a very stressful situation for me. "Trust me. Everything is going to be fine. I've got you", God kept whispering to me over and over again. I truly did believe this, yet it was so hard for me to at the same time.
I headed to bed at around 11. I laid awake a little longer journaling and praying (under the safety of my mosquito net of course) and sometime after dozed off.
Tuesday 01/17/17:
I was wide awake at 5:30 a.m., but laid curled up under my covers and net as two birds frantically flew around my room and would not get out. Every time I would attempt to get out, one would come flying towards me. I finally braved it and ran outside my room and walked over to Job and Adria's and asked for a broom to chase those dumb exotic birds out. I like the outdoors, but I can only handle so much outdoorsyness. Once they were finally out, I got ready for the day and took time to do my devos and prepare for the day. We ate breakfast and then Job and I picked up a Honduran teacher and he dropped us off at the bus stop. We rode the bus with the kids and I enjoyed spending a little more time with some of my third graders. We arrived and I headed to the classroom to get my things settled before the kiddos arrived. I was in the Kindergarten room, while they were being tested individually in English and Spanish. We watched some movies and did lots of coloring. They had a few worksheets to work on and once they were finished they were able to play. It was a pretty laid back day filled with lots of tears (from them) and hugs. After school I rode the bus home and the walked through the village to get home. I was greeted by Carlitos, Bobby, and Meesa. They are 3 of the boys who live on the farm with the missionaries that own the property. They are so sweet! Once I threw my things in my room, I played out side with those 3 and their sister Sydney. Ugh they stole my heart. They asked numerous times why I was leaving and when I would reply with that I had to go home, they would reply that I was home. My home was here and I lived in the casita. I choked back the tears as I tried to explain that I lived in the United States and that I can't stay here because I was not from Honduras. When they were okay with the fact that I could not stay, they insisted that they come back with me. If only sweet ones..If only. This was one of the last nights Job, Adria, and I would have together, because Job was leaving for Langue (a 5 hour drive) early in the morning and would not be back until Friday when I would leave. We spent the night talking and reflecting on my time there and once again I was biting my lip, because I did not want to leave.
Wednesday 01/18/17
3 more days. They day started normally until Adria and I were getting ready to leave for school and the truck would not start. Long story short after trying multiple times and Job's dad coming out to try and fix it, they had to take it to get repaired. Job's dad took me to school that day which was great, but He knows hardly any English and we misunderstood each other on how to get to La Providencia. There's no google maps either so we were on our own until we stopped and asked for directions. I was a little over an hour late, but I was in the library with Miss. Lizzie that day so it was okay. The day was fairly uneventful, because it was exam week. We were out of school by noon and Adria picked me up at around 1 and we went into town to pick up a few more things before I left on Saturday. We went to a few random souvenir shops, ate Honduran tacos (very different from Mexican tacos) Got some ice cream and then headed to Job's sisters house, where they were having a going away party for Job's uncle who was returning to Chicago on Thursday. It was a blast! They sang Spanish songs and said some beautiful things. I got to hang out we Keran which was so fun! Even though we had minimal communication because we were not good at speaking each others language, we had fun! We left around 8ish, which was late for us or anyone to leave. We always tried to make it home before 6, because it would still be a little warm so showering was not freezing and it is not safe to be out anywhere after dark, even if you're just driving. Once we got home I filled up my water bottle and headed over to the casita where I got ready for bed a chased out geckos. Not much sleep happened, but resting was nice.
Thursday 01/19/17
2 More days. So I can change my plane ticket so that I can stay longer right? Because I don't want to leave. I laid in bed a little longer, because i didn't want the day to start yet. I wanted to stay here, even though I spent so much time wishing I was back home with hot water and all the luxuries I did not need or even want anymore. I reluctantly got ready, ate breakfast, and then went to school. Today was another slow day, so i wandered down to the clinic. There was an Orthopedic team from the United States and they had been very busy so I figured I would go check it out. I was able to walk in the waiting room, the recovery room, and even look into the surgical room. It took all I had not to break down. There were kids everywhere crying in pain, but I had to remember how good this is. They are receiving very inexpensive and even free medical care, that they would not otherwise receive. Something they were born with and shunned them from society, is finally being treated. I looked and saw all the kids and teens in casts and heavily sedated, but I got a beautiful glimpse into their future. It is so hard for me to fully describe how I felt while I was there, all I know is that my heart hurt. A lot. I was in the clinic most of the morning, occasionally stepping outside to keep myself from falling apart. I spent the afternoon with my ornery kindergartners. Oh those little boogers were so sneaky, but oh do I love them. They were still taking tests so I kept them in the room while they went out one by one. We had lots of fun, but they sure liked to test my limits.
After school, Adria and I went to Comayagua, which is about an hour away from Siguat. We went to a museum, saw the oldest clock in the Americas, and went to other random spots. Comayagua was absolutely beautiful! It was filled with color and life where ever I looked! We left around 4 and arrived home around 5 where Adria and I had our last round of smoothies and grilled peanut butter and banana sandwiches. It's crazy how quickly my time here went. How is it possible that in just 74 hours I will be home? I took, my time getting ready and leaving for the casita that night and getting ready for bed. It's weird, because I just spent a lot of time starring at things. Trying to mentally save every image. I did not want to ever forget anything, because I was not sure if I would return, but I have a strong feeling that I will be returning very soon. Before I went to bed, Adria helped me pack and gather everything for tomorrow. After all that could be packed was packed, Adria headed back to their house and I sat under my mosquito net journaling and chatting with God until we lost power again. I knew it would probably be out until the morning or mid afternoon so I laid in my bed scrolling through pictures I had captured and writing notes until I fell asleep sometime after 3.
Friday 01/20/17
The birds squawked loud at 5 and I was again, wide awake. "If I don't get out of bed then I don't have to leave.." I slowly got out of bed and prepared for the day ahead. Praying God would bring me back sometime soon. I had one last breakfast with Job and Adria which consisted of a little bit of everything I knew I'd miss (Honduran coffee (THE BEST), scrambled eggs, beans, lemon bread, and tortillas). We finished our breakfast and then it was time for my last day of school. We jumped in the car and headed down the mountain to the bus stop. "Wow... I had know idea I would be so sad this was my last time riding the bus." We arrived at school and for the last time for awhile, I was greeted with sweet, happy, loving, ornery, faces. "Miss. Rebekah, Miss. Rebekah!!! Watch this! Miss. Rebekah, I colored this for you, Miss. Rebekah I made this for you to take home, Miss. Rebekah can we come with you?! Miss. Rebekah we love you, please don't leave us, you are our favorite!" Oh my heart was swelling with tears and happiness. A week ago, half of them hated me for taking away their recess and now everywhere I looked I was greeted with smiles and hugs. How was I supposed to leave them today?! How am I supposed to go back to my privileged life style and leave them here with nothing? I want to stay here for ever. This is my home and I can not leave. I spent the day with kindergarten again and floating to classrooms to say, "goodbye".. My heart was broken most of the day, because the reality that I was leaving was more real than ever and I didn't want it to be. I've said that like a gagillion times, but I really did not want to leave. Sure I was excited to see my family and friends, but I now had family and friends here in Honduras. Plus I had so many sweet children to love and take care of.
2 o'clock came around and Job and Adria picked me up to travel to home one last time and to say goodbye. I said my final "goodbyes" and "I love you"'s to my sweet children and to the staff. It was a long 20 minute drive as I tried to soak up every last bit and mentally save pictures of my surroundings and try my best to keep it together. We arrived at the farm where I grabbed my suitcase and backpack and loaded it into the back of the vehicle. I said my final goodbyes to the Colbaths and took one last long walk around the farm as I tried to just soak it all in. "This month went way too quickly. I'm not ready to leave, it's too soon. This place is so beautiful and so broken. Lord, give me strength as I go back." The tears that had been in my eyes all day were trying real hard to flow out, and I was not going to let them, not yet anyway. We left the farm at around 5 and started the 2 hour drive. Once we got to San Pedro, around 7:30 we stopped to eat and then headed to the airport where I paid my exit fee, checked my luggage, and waited until it was time to go to security. My mind drifted back to when I first arrived. I was so scared and so timid and had no idea what I was about to experience. Job and Adria spent some more time talking with me and praying over me, before it was time for me to go through security. I hugged them both, gave them endless 'thank you's', told them I would be back soon, and just when I thought I had made it with out any tears, all the tears I had been holding back came pouring out as I waved from the other side of the immigration window. I had my passport stamped, picture and finger prints checked, and then I was headed to security upstairs. Once I was cleared I found a window that over looked the "lobby" of the airport, where I spotted Job and Adria and that was officially our last "good bye" as we waved to each other with huge smiles. Wow oh wow have they sure blessed my life! I was all checked in and ready to go, but I still had around an hour and a half before my plane would leave (aka 2 a.m.) I went to grab a water and check out, because I was sooooo thirsty, but I had totally forgotten that the small amount of Honduran money I saved for souvenirs was packed away and my card worked at like 2 places over here (Darn it master card!) after debating if I should just fill up my water bottle with sink water I decided I still did not want to risk it, especially since I wasn't sure if the airport water was drinkable or not. I checked my phone and noticed I was down to like 33% so I found a spot on the ground where I plugged my phone in and waited as it slowly charged. (I mean super slow, like it only charged about 10% in an hour..) I sat and journaled, prayed for my trip, for Job and Adria's trip back home, for those I was leaving, and for what I would return to. I knew I was not prepared to encounter life in the United States again and I knew it was going to be a long hard struggle. I ate my last baby banana (literally the BEST bananas ever!) right before 1:45 am when it was time to board. Fear and worry began to set in.. In just under 24 hours I would be home, but my Nebraska home was the last place I wanted to be in that moment. I shoved my back pack under the seat in front of me and held my purse between the wall of the plane and myself. I wish I could have slept on this flight, but I was instructed by many to not sleep on the flight from San Pedro to Fort Lauderdale and to be extremely observant. So I was. Our flight left on time at 2 a.m. and we landed in Ft. Lauderdale at around 6:30 a.m. I was already exhausted, because I had officially been awake for 24 hours, plus I only had like 4 hours of sleep the day before. We exited the plan and headed to our respected areas. A majority of the plane went to the immigration line as I headed to the citizen line. Security was crazy as this was just 2 weeks after the shooting that took place at this airport. My heart broke many times while I was in this air port. As I saw families turned away in the immigration line and others saying painful good byes. It was finally my turn to start the process. I stood in front of a machine that scanned my face and finger prints and passport and then printed me a ticket, where I then went through security again, finally to arrive at the entrance point where the took the printed ticket as well as the card I filled out on the plane, and my passport. They asked me many questions as I tried to stay calm and remember everything Job and Adria had told me to do. Once I was cleared and my passport was stamped for the final time I was led through security one last time and led to the area where I would grab my bags and then process them again. As I arrived to the luggage claim my heart dropped as tears rolled down my face. There. Right there. 3 feet in front of me. A blood stain. Another over there and one right next to the carousel my bags were on. I froze. In my head I was partially thinking, "Rebekah you have a 5 hour layover and spent 4.25 of those hours in customs and security. You need to get coffee, check your luggage, and find your gate." but the other part of me.. "Oh my gosh. no. no .no .no. no. My friends were just here... they lived through this.. I was here less than 2 weeks before this and am here now... No. This is not fine. This is not okay." I finally moved my feet, grabbed my luggage, and rechecked it, but I stood there starring at the baggage claim area, thinking about how I could have very easily been there. I was supposed to be there. The day it happened was one of my original flight dates, but turned out tickets were cheaper for the next week so I switched. That blood on the carpet could have very easily been mine, but by the grace of God it wasn't. He had His hands on me the whole time and new exactly the dates I should be in Honduras. I am soooo loved by Him and standing in that baggage claim made that even more real! I gathered myself and headed upstairs. I had 20 minutes before my gate opened so I grabbed some coffee and a breakfast burrito. I took 3 bites of my burrito and immediately regretted it. Yep, not so easy to jump back into food from the U.S. I threw up in the trash can right next to me and chugged a bottle of water (because I was super thirsty) again a bad idea as I threw that up too. Instead i sat and charged my phone and sipped on my coffee and water. I once again had cell service and I was able to text my mom to let her know I was still alive and well. I was also able to contact many friends that I missed dearly. A phone cleanse was very good for me, but it was also nice to be able to be social with those I missed. I boarded my plane at 11 a.am. for an 11:45 departure. (We left at noon). From Fort Lauderdale, I had an hour and half flight to Orlando. Luckily I got to stay on the plane, because the next stop was Kansas City, which was a 3 and a 1/2 hour flight. I finally landed in Kansas City at around 6. By the time we exited the plan and I found my luggage it was almost 6:30 p.m. on Saturday. I grabbed some more coffee (the last time I had been to bed was Thursday night and I was up at 5 on Friday morning, so this was a necessity) and then I waited for my mom to pick me up which was shortly after. I stood in the pick up area in shock. "I'm here and I do not want to be. I never thought coming home would feel so weird and be so unsettling. Where am I?" I gave my mom a huge hug and loaded my things into the van and we headed to a pizza place to eat with some of my mom's college friends. I have to admit I was a little upset, because I hadn't slept for almost 2 days, nor showered, I just arrived home and had a big adjustment to make, I did not want to be with people. I had too much to process. I put a smile on my face and we ate, well I watched them eat, because I didn't dare try to eat anything. We finally left for the 3.5 hour drive home at 8. We were in Beatrice by 11:30, but before heading all the way home it was a necessity to stop and see my grandparents, especially my Gram who had been sick. I gave them their souvenirs and we finally pulled in our drive way at 12. I unloaded everything, threw some laundry in the wash, took a quick shower, ate some eggs and finally jumped in my bed at 1:45 ish. I had officially been up for 49 hours, but I was home and in my bed, with no geckos and birds, which little did I know I would end up missing shortly after.
I am SO incredibly blessed to have had this opportunity to see the brokenness and beauty of Honduras, the grace and love of our merciful God, and the chance to shatter and callous my heart. Honduras will always be another home and a piece of my heart will always be there. Please feel free to read my blogs prior to this one as well as the blog that sheds some light on what it was like for me to come back to the United States.
While I so badly want to return this year, for wonderful reasons, God shut those doors and while I am saddened by the fact I will not return this year, I am greatly filled with joy with the new door he swung open, so I am also excited to announce that on January 12th I will be headed to Narobi Kenya in Africa on a Medical Mission trip!!!
My heart is so ready to serve the African people and this amazing God! I ask the you please keep me and the team I will be travelling with in your prayers as we prepare to go. If you have any questions about this trip or how you can support me, please do not hesitate to ask!
thank you for following my journey to Honduras as this is the "last official" post, meaning this is the last post I wrote in Honduras. All other posts will be stories/ memories/ and maybe a few random journals.
Love,
Rebekah
P.S. a link to pictures!! Also please understand that due to safety concerns, I can not, at this time, post pictures of the children from La providencia, but I would love to show you if you ask!
https://www.facebook.com/bekah.raielle16/media_set?set=a.1457038647670095.1073741847.100000919207499&type=3
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